The Equidistribution of Lattice Shapes of Rings: A Friendly Thesis


So, you’re never going to read my doctoral thesis. That’s fair enough. Few people are ever going to, and even the parts that got turned into papers or textbooks are going to attract few readers. They’re meant for people interested in a particular problem that I never expected most people to find interesting. I’m at ease with that. I wrote for an audience I expected knew nearly all the relevant background, and that was used to reading professional, research-level mathematics. But I knew that the non-mathematics-PhDs in my life would look at it and say they only understood the word ‘the’ on the title page. Even if they could understand more, they wouldn’t try.

Dr Piper Alexis Harron tried meeting normal folks halfway. She took her research, and the incredible frustrations of doing that research — doctoral research is hard, and is almost as much an endurance test as anything else — and wrote what she first meant to be “a grenade launched at my ex-prison”. This turned into something more exotic. It’s a thesis “written for those who do not feel that they are encouraged to be themselves”, people who “don’t do math the `right way’ but could still greatly contribute to the community”.

The result is certainly the most interesting mathematical academic writing I’ve run across. It’s written on several levels, including one meant for people who have heard of mathematics certainly but don’t partake in the stuff themselves. It’s exciting reading and I hope you give it a try. It may not be to your tastes — I’m wary of words like ‘laysplanation’ — but it isn’t going to be boring. And Dr Harron’s secondary thesis, that mathematicians need to more aggressively welcome people into the fold, is certainly right.

You’re not missing anything by not reading my thesis. Although my thesis defense offered the amusing sidelight that the campus’s albino squirrel got into the building. My father and some of the grad student friends of mine were trying without anything approaching success to catch it. I’m still not sure why they thought the squirrel needed handling by them.

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Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there.

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